Prenups aren’t just for the rich and famous anymore. More and more couples are signing on the dotted line before walking down the aisle. We asked a group of women their take on the prenup and why they did or did not sign and what they learned from the process. Here are their stories:
My Husband’s Business Partner Insisted I Sign the Prenup
My husband-to-be’s business partner insisted that I sign the prenup or he would not continue in the business with my husband. The business partner had been through a very nasty divorce which put a huge stress on the business. The business wouldn’t be able to withstand another financial hit.
I didn’t have a problem with signing off on any portion of the business. I was not involved in the business and had no plans to be. It definitely softened the blow of being asked to sign a prenup because of the business partner and not because of my husband.
Note: The couple ended up divorcing in the end. The wife said it was an amicable separation because the prenup had outlined how the division of property would be on break up. They saved a lot of stress and legal fees.
I Asked for the Prenup and My Husband Freaked Out
When I asked my husband-to-be for a prenup he freaked out at me and my family, which caused problems for me and my family. I was part of a very successful family business. My parents wanted him to sign a prenup so that he would not be entitled to a portion of the business if we broke up. It was the single best decision I ever made. My husband was abusive and when we divorced, he walked away without touching our family property. In hindsight, the fact that he was so opposed to signing or even having a conversation about a prenup was a red flag.
My Husband Insisted He Sign a Prenup to Protect Me
My family is wealthy and owns a number of properties. My husband insisted we get a prenup because he didn’t want me to think that he was after my money. We sat down and came up with a plan on what would happen to our assets if we were to break up. It was a very easy, simple discussion. I thought it was a really caring conversation and act that my husband wanted me to be secure. We are still happily married.
I Was Offended at First
When my husband asked me about a prenup, my first reaction was to be offended. Then I took some time to learn about what exactly a prenup is. It is just an “in case of emergency” contract. The best part about the prenup is that it forces you to have some very important discussions with your soon to be spouse, before you get married. You must both be on the same page. I also learned that because it is a contract I should be negotiating and not just taking the proposal my husband made. We talked about asset and property division and support. We talked about our plan to have kids and what that would mean for my career. Overall, it was a good process. A few bumps along the way but I was very happy to have these conversations before walking down the aisle.
I Gladly Signed One – This Was My Second Marriage and his Third
We both understood that marriage is not only romance but also hard work. We recognized that even if with all that effort and good intention, the relationship can still fall apart. My husband-to-be had worked very hard to rebuild his wealth after his first divorce. I had no problem acknowledging this and to exclude it from our marital assets. I found the process to be very respectful and transparent. I have nothing negative to say about signing a prenup and I think people do themselves a big disservice by not having one.
I’m Single and Not Married – If I Was Asked I Wouldn’t Be Offended.
While I am single and not married, I would have no problem signing a prenup. My two cents, it’s much nicer to divide you stuff up when you are in love and not when you are breaking up and angry. It is a caring act to make sure that both of you are treated fairly and looked after in case the worst happens. Many times if you are getting divorced, it means one or both of you has changed. You may not even recognize the person you are now dealing with.
I Dumped the Guy Who Asked Me to Sign a Prenup
I was asked to sign a prenup by my Ex. Through the process of having conversations about the prenup and what happens on break up, I learned he had some definite anger problems and I did not want to have that in my life. While it wasn’t because of the prenup per se, I dumped the guy. I would still sign a prenup even if my next partner is in a similar financial situation as me.
It was a Business Decision
My husband owned a company and had children before we met. When we were talking about getting married, I was very clear that I would not walk away from this relationship with nothing. At the same time, I wouldn’t take more than I needed to rebuild my life. I understood his position and he understood mine. It was a business decision. We are both protected. I was grateful we had this important conversation calmly and rationally.
Prenups are more common now than ever. They provide benefits for any marriages not just for the rich and famous. Before you get upset because your partner brings up a prenup, take the time to have a conversation with your significant other. Having an open and honest conversation about your financial future is actually a really good sign of a relationship is strong and you both will be in it for the long haul.
Speaking with an experienced lawyer can help you make sure you’re fully considering the impact of a prenup. Learn more about the Modern Marriage Contract at www.loveandmoney.ca.
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